Did Something Steal Your Joy?

From Advent: A 25 Day Countdown to Christmas on YouVersion

This Christmas, some people are living in the happiest season of their lives, while others are walking through their darkest moments. Neither experience is an indicator of God’s love. But it can sure feel that way sometimes.

One of the first stories in the Bible is about what happens when jealousy steals someone’s joy.

As we explore this story, let’s remember our definition of joy. Joy is a resilient cheerfulness anchored in the goodness of God.

Abel also brought of the firstborn of his flock and of their fat portions. And the Lord had regard for Abel and his offering, but for Cain and his offering he had no regard. So Cain was very angry, and his face fell. The Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry, and why has your face fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door. Its desire is contrary to you, but you must rule over it.” Cain spoke to Abel his brother. And when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel and killed him. Then the Lord said to Cain, “Where is Abel your brother?” He said, “I do not know; am I my brother’s keeper?” And the Lord said, “What have you done? The voice of your brother’s blood is crying to me from the ground. – Genesis 4:4-10 ESV

The story centers on two brothers: the shepherd, Abel, and the farmer, Cain. Both brought good gifts to God. God accepts Abel’s gift, but rejects Cain’s. Why? The story itself doesn’t offer many clues.

Cain is visibly shaken. Scripture says his “face falls.” You probably know some of what he felt. Feelings like disappointment, frustration, defeat. But let’s pause and imagine what could have happened if Cain experienced joy instead of jealousy.

He might have felt disappointed, but he would have known that God and Abel were on his side. He would have believed everyone, including himself, had room to grow—allowing him to view setbacks as growth opportunities rather than shameful failures. And he would have been able to celebrate Abel’s success.

But that’s not what happened. Instead, Cain’s experience led him to feel jealous toward Abel, and bitter toward God.

Have you ever felt the same way? You’ve made sacrifices for God, like spending time in Scripture, serving your community, and maybe even giving to your local church, but your life doesn’t seem any different. It can feel frustrating, like God has abandoned you, leading to bitterness.

Then you see the good things God’s doing in the lives of others. Like a friend who made an incredible recovery while you’ve been praying for healing from chronic pain. Or when a young couple posts about their newborn baby while you’ve been on a devastating, decade-long fertility journey with no happy end in sight.

Comparing their experience with yours makes it hard to hold on to joy, and easy to question God’s goodness.

Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy!He who goes out weeping, bearing the seed for sowing, shall come home with shouts of joy, bringing his sheaves with him. – Psalm 126:5-6 ESV

Cain’s jealousy caused him to stop seeing Abel as a brother and start seeing him as an enemy. Eventually, Cain lashed out, killing his brother and trying to hide it from God.

It’s rare that a lack of joy results in physical violence. More often, it leads us to either hide or lash out, hurting people through our words, actions, or distance.

When jealousy and bitterness steal our joy, we’re left drained and empty, trying to take what momentary happiness we can find in a desperate attempt to fill the void. So, how do we stop ourselves from becoming like Cain?

I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living! Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord! – Psalm 27:13-14 ESV

Well, when we feel disappointed or heartbroken, remember that life is full of ups and downs, but God’s goodness and love are constant. He hasn’t forgotten you, you’re not a failure, and He doesn’t hate you.

I have set the Lord always before me; because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices; my flesh also dwells secure. For you will not abandon my soul to Sheol, or let your holy one see corruption. You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore. – Psalm 16:8-11 ESV

And when we see friends, family members, or strangers on social media who seem to be living the best days of their lives, we work to keep jealousy at bay. You don’t know the private battles they might be fighting or what challenges they might face in the future. Instead, celebrate alongside them today.

Pause and Pray:

Lord, thank You for always being with me. Please help me to accept Your gift of joy even when I walk through hard times. Help me to know You are with me even when I don’t feel You. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Reflect or Discuss:

Is there an area of my life where I’m feeling jealous? How can I choose joy instead?