Raising an adult

Stop cutting 6 feet off your parenting.

A few years ago we were at soccer practice- I have never forgotten this moment. The kids were told to run around the field, go to the corner and make their way back to the center. The first few kids did it correctly, but they all quickly started cutting the corner. When my son got to the point where kids were cutting, I yelled out “all the way to the corner! Do it right! We aren’t cheaters!”

One of the kids fathers looked at me and goes “geez, it’s only 6 feet.”

I didn’t say anything at the time. I shrugged it off and sat back down. But his comment has literally stuck with me for years now and I’ve always wondered “would you cut 6′ off a wall if you were building a house? 6 inches? 6 centimeters?”

No. You wouldn’t. You’re going to do your best to build that house exactly to spec. You aren’t going to say “oh, well, this board is 6 feet short, too bad-we’ll make it work.” You’re going to go out and get another board. Why? Because cutting corners on that home causes structural integrity issues. Cutting corners means you end up with a lopsided house that can’t be trusted to provide you shelter in storms.

I’ve been volunteering at the school on Monday’s. There are 45 kids in the club I work with. It’s terrible. Absolutely horrible. I love volunteering, I love working with my sons class, but I’ve never seen anything like this before. These kids are mean, nasty, and disrespectful. They have zero accountability. They scream, they run, they don’t listen, they don’t follow directions. They aren’t quiet when the teacher talks. They have no respect whatsoever.

The problem is the lack of parenting. The problem is, these parents think it’s ok to cut 6 feet off their job. Do you realize you are raising an adult? Not a child? We don’t raise children, we raise adults. It is your job to teach them to be decent people. It’s your job to teach them what is right and what is wrong. It’s your job to teach respect and responsibility. (Don’t even get me started on the kids that have zero idea how to clean up after themselves.)

Discipline your son, for there is hope;

do not set your heart on putting him to death.

Proverbs 19:18 ESV

When you choose to take a short cut on parenting, you are choosing to cut that 6′ off that wall. You are messing up the integrity of your child. You are teaching them that it is ok to be lopsided and not put in full effort.

As a society we need to stop cutting that 6′. Don’t let your child cut 6′, because then the next one thinks it’s ok, and then the next. Then we have an even bigger problem.

Stop cutting 6′. Stop letting your child cut 6′. The era of children being raised right now is not a good one. Something needs to change.

“My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord,

nor be weary when reproved by him.

For the Lord disciplines the one he loves,

and chastises every son whom he receives.”

It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? 

If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. 

Hebrews 12:5b-8 ESV

I could go on further, I could write an entire book. But I know most people don’t even read this much at all (that’s another thing, bring back books!), so I’ll stop here. Just please, stop cutting 6′ off your parenting. Your child needs a solid foundation, solid walls, a solid roof if you expect them to become decent people.

Just like God rebukes and corrects us, His children, He wants us to discipline our own children too.

Discipline your son, and he will give you rest;

he will give delight to your heart.

Proverbs 29:17 ESV

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